light my way

Wednesday, July 30, 2008 ;

4:31 PM

Hampi's growing diary

Hehe Baby took these pictures for you to cheer you up.

She's hontoni kawaii desho

:))))

Hampi's kodak moment. Managed to take this shot just before she fell off the wheel completely and woke up. She's sooooo cute!!!! She's so amusing to watch. Haha :)

light my way ♥

;

12:57 PM

Hampi's growing diary!

Baby here's a pic for you!

Prepped a dish of veggies for her (carrots and broccoli) and our princess sure love her greenies! :))

Wish you were here watching her grow up into one picky princess!

And my fingers hurt from snapping her biscuits. Wish you were around to help me!

And hor, she picks her food. She doesn't like some of the stuff in her mix.

She's sleeping now. Eat already then sleep. Good life ya! :))

:))))

We miss you!

light my way ♥

Tuesday, July 29, 2008 ;

5:55 PM

Message for Baby

Hampi loves her broccoli!

light my way ♥

Monday, July 28, 2008 ;

11:30 PM

"It's hard watching Nobuta becoming others. I just Nobuta to be only mine. I don't even want others to be looking at her."

A line from this jdrama Nobuta no Produce that I am currently watching. A little selfish but a whole lot of truth in it. I guess it only goes to prove the point that love is indeed selfish.

I guess to many, it is important for the person you love to treat u not just a little more special, but a whole lot more special than he/she treats someone else.

With Leon gone from my side to that dreaded place, I have come to realize how blissful it actually is to lead a very normal and very consistent life with a familiar figure. Not that I am looking for someone to fill the gap. That gap cannot be filled for sure. He may be gone from my side physically but he's definitely still there in my heart. What I am saying is, it really is a quiet blessing to be with that special someone, doing the things you normally do, like catching a movie, having a meal together, walking side by side, going to the supermarket together, going to a convenience store together; the normal everyday thing that the both of you do without putting much thought into it.

He has spent about 4 years apart from me, about 1 year plus as "special friends", and another year plus as a couple. By right I should have been used to this. But somehow, it's never something I could get used to. If everything goes well, this will be the final time we will be apart for his stint at ANU. Come december, he should be back by my side. 4 months should be nothing considered the fact that we have been apart for 4 years. But damn, this final 4 months seem hard to bear. Perhaps he has been home for way too long... not that I minded. Just that I wished he didn't have to go back..

And honestly, it did make me realize something; that I will never want to be apart from him like this again, ever. If he has to work overseas, I think I will relocate with him. LDR is not easy at all. Not the least bit. Takes a lot of patience and effort, and a lot of trust for sure. Things that I am still trying to work within myself to give a little more of those with each passing day.

But I do miss him, terribly.

I dream about the most mundane things that we always do, like eating, walking around, and I find it hard to wake up from them. Little reminders like these keep me going.

Anyhow no idea why I am rattling off about these.

Oh well.

Now, I just hope and pray that he will be able to find a suitable apartment like REALLY soon and settle down quick. I miss seeing him and I miss talking to him. I need him to have his landline and webcam up and working.

Sigh.

1 day down. A million more to go.

Oh well.

Another day gone by is another day less to bear.

BE STRONG AND BE HAPPY!

I love you Baby!

(Still, come home quick!)

light my way ♥

;

6:43 PM

Message to Baby

Hampi's update again!

Funny picture to entertain you.

She sleeps like a dog here. Hahaha :)

Look at her legs sticking out of the wheel. Damn relac :))

light my way ♥

;

12:26 AM

Message to Baby
*Update at 12.30am

Baby!!! Hampi made a little nest finally! It's located in front of her wheel and shes sleeping in it now, with her little whiskers sticking out! She's soooo adorable!!! :)

Our baby is so clever! :))))) Just like her daddy :p

A picture for you!

She's facing her wheel, can you see her eyes? The little black slit there :)))))
She's sleeping at the moment, had to take this secretly so she wouldn't wakie :))
So cute right!!! :)

Hey sleepyhead, say hi to daddy!!

light my way ♥

Sunday, July 27, 2008 ;

9:55 PM

Message to Baby

Hey Baby!
Guess what, I gave Hampi some shreds of tissue today to see if she will use them as bedding material and guess what? Our little princess is shifting them near her wheel! She's doing it as we speak! It's really a cute precious sight to watch! I wish you were here to see it for yourself. You will be so proud of her!

A picture of our little princess for you :)
Hampi say Hi to daddy!

ps: She's still trying to pull the tissue bedding up to the wheel. Lol :)

I wove you!
:)

light my way ♥

;

7:59 PM

Hampi misses her daddy

She hangs her head low on the wheel and opens her eye each time I approach her.
She seems to understand when I tell her daddy loves her and misses her, and heads back into a proper sleeping position afterwards.

I think she misses her daddy, like I do.
Somehow, it feels a little comforting to know I am not the only person who feels sad.
At least there's Hampi with me.
And Baby Ham, Usachan, Mr Eeyore, Piglet and Crush.

I wish to count down to the day you come home.
But I am afraid.

It hurts.
To think of them.

The days that seem too short..
And the nights that seem too long..

Come home soon Baby..
I miss you.

light my way ♥

Saturday, July 26, 2008 ;

10:39 PM

I miss the warmth of your hand against mine.
I miss the warm friendly smile whenever our eyes meet.
I miss Leona's cabaret dance.
I miss you making fun of me until my head hurt.
I miss having you in my sight at every turn of my head.
I miss having you ask me what we are going to eat.
I miss having you call me greedy names.
I miss having you snore softly next to me.
I miss watching you eat your food.
I miss watching the world go by with you.
I miss sitting next to you in the cinema, holding your warm soft hands.
I miss playing zookeeper with you.
I miss the scent of euphoria on you.
I miss that feeling of pride with you behind the wheel solo.
I miss your beautiful big eyes.
I miss doing masks with you.
I miss watching vids with you.
I miss watching you play with Hampi.
I miss going to new places with you.
I miss exploring quirky eating places with you.
I miss having your hand around me on escalators.
I miss walking to the petrol station with you.
I miss sharing pearly soya milk with you.
I miss having our favourite chicken rice with you.
I miss being around you.
All the time.

After 8 months of complete bliss, it's back to reality again.

And so, Baby is flying to Sydney to take another flight to Canberra as we speak.

Don't really know how to describe my state of emotions.

Crushed, heartbroken, in denial, in shock, lost, lovelorn, constant brink of tears.

It's everything and more.

It's funny how you don't get sick of someone after spending almost every other day with him.

It's funny how it only reaffirms how much you want to spend the rest of your life loving him.

I really miss him.

So much...............................................................

And I wish this were just a bad dream.

And when I wake up in the morning, you will be right there, beside me.

I love you Baby.

Hurry home to me............

I miss you.......

:(

I miss you...

I really do.

:(

light my way ♥

;

9:27 PM

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light my way ♥

;

6:14 PM

The hardest thing isn't the pain of separation, but the pain in my heart when I saw your crying sobbing face.

Etched in my heart.

So clearly, so painfully.

=(((((((((((((((((

I miss you dearly, terribly, painfully.

Come home.

light my way ♥

Saturday, July 12, 2008 ;

12:40 AM

A perfect date

Early morning.
Bright smiles at Vivo.
Holding hands while chatting and laughing.
Holding his cup of starbucks while he smokes.
Scent of his perfume and malboro in the air.
Having yummy lunch at Bakerinz with yummy bailey's creme souffle (my fav alcoholllllll!!!!)
Catching Red Cliff with my one true love.
Holding hands as we walked.
Taking a bus ride to town.
Chomping on wagyu (kobe!!!) beef and pork belly at Gyu Kaku. (ZOMG best place if you love meat like me)
Fats coating my palette and deliciousness bursting out of my taste buds.
Grocery shopping at cold storage.
Baby walking me home (yes, we walked from chimes/bugis all the time!)
Hold hands, laughing, chatting.

Today was the perfect date.
With the perfect guy, and our perfect love.
Nothing is fancy, nor over the top.
Just perfection that exists between two imperfect people who are in perfect harmony.
Contentment I guess.
I am contented.
And so is he :)

Baby never fails to make me realize over and over again how much he cares about me and my state of mind.

His vvc is on the way and he surprised me by saying something I felt was really sweet.

"Next time I can fetch you from your house to come punggol ok?"

"We can go look for your that chi char store that you are always talking about too ok?" he said suddenly the other day.

:)

May not be a big thing, as prolly all bfs do that, but I guess, the effect of hearing it from the person I love really left me gushing.

2 more weeks before he leaves for Canberra. I hate Canberra.
And every single second that slips away............. hurts.
I feel so scared to fall asleep sometimes.
Because if I do, that's another couple of hours passed.
And I know (and is constantly reminded by my subconcious mind) that it will be another 4-5 arduous months of being away from him physically.
Being random here.
I am sad.
But happy.
Sad when we are apart.
Happy when we meet.
And I making sense?

Baby says I should have seen the blissful look on my face when I eat. But I do not think it's just the food that made the meal intensely flavorful. It is the company that matters more. It is a mutual keen appreciation for the food that is placed in front of us, and the companionship that whips up the appetite. Somehow, eating with him is especially joyful. I hardly eat half as much of the same thing when I am with other people. :)

2 weeks.
Can't sleep.

light my way ♥

Wednesday, July 09, 2008 ;

1:25 AM

I hope I can stay this happy and blissful, always.

Baby loves me, and I can see it in every little thing he does =)))

It's not just in every thing he says, but also in every single tiny gesture that he does.

I am happy, so happy I can't imagine how I can live my life otherwise.

You came in this afternoon at 5pm after your shower with the nuggets and apple pie toasted to a perfect golden crisp after I complained I was getting a little hungry, and that was all it took to make me fall in love with you all over again. We could have waited until it was dinner since we were preparing to go out to meet the guys for dinner. But still, you took the effort to toast them up for me and made sure my favourite sauce comes served with it............. Thank you babY!!!!! You are amazing!

Thank you Baby, for paying attention to every single complaint/grimace I make. You don't just comfort me with words, you always go the extra mile to comfort me with your actions. You may not be the most expressive sweet talker to me, but your actions sure speak of the love you have for me! :)

I am thankful, so thankful, to have you!

I wove you!!

light my way ♥