Went out with Baby today.

Was supposed to go for a movie date but because *someone* wanted to take advantage of the UOB discount, *someone* said to go to buy from the box office because "there were many seats left". Hahahaha. So in the end.. we didn't manage to catch it.

But nevermind..

Cause Baby brought me to pig out at our favourite chinese joint Ding Tai Feng!

Had our favourite dan chao fan, xiao long baosssss! Fried meat wantans and veggies! Very full.

Hahaha.

I love my Baby.

He is so funny.

And he always feed me fat fat.

:)













Being loved by you, feels amazing.

Different, but amazing.

And there's nothing more in this world that I want, than to have you tell me you love me.

Because, being loved by you, feels amazing.

So won't you tell me, again and again, that you love me :)

Because, I love you too.



Back home.

I dunno what I feel now.

Came home empty handed and a heavy heart.

It's weird so many emotions can be felt within a short span of time.

I think I am doing it again.

Just to a different someone, that's all.

It's all smiles in front of my parents, when I am tearing inside.

I wasted my entire Sunday, jostling with people, feeling excitement, and then disappointment and finally hurt.

The only good thing that came out of today was that Leon got his NDS. Didn't get mine. It's too expensive so I guess I'll buy it for myself another day.

Paid 340 bucks for it, 100 less than my fucking NDS, and it came with a crystal case. Guess I won't have to worry about what to get him for Christmas anymore. Heart pain pain but I guess if it makes him happy.....

I hope, my life doesn't get lonelier from now on.

I can only pray.

And wait, and watch.

3 more weeks to end of my notice. I don't know what's gonna happen. Guess it's time to tighten my belts. Got a Leona and Leon to feed, and 3 other dependents apart from my parents. Hahaha.

Haven't gone for a facial in 2-3 months. Long overdue. Still don't know if I should sign up for the diamond peel package. But I am outta a job, maybe I should settle for something less. 300 for 5 sessions of my regular one perhaps.

And my hair. Rebonding? That's approximate 200-300. >300with colour. My god, so ex. Maybe I should wait till I get a job.

And my phone. G600! Looks great! But that's gonna cost 338 at least.

Looks like this is going to be a poor month!

Sigh, money money, I need to make lots of money!












I feel overwhelmed,

With sadness.



Eat, drink, make merry

Leon's back, and so is fun filled activities.

Hahaha.

Been out practically everyday even though it was unplanned.

Caught 2 movies last week too!

The Game Plan and Stardust.

Game Plan was cuteeeeeeeee (the Rock!!!! sho cute!) while Stardust was really beautiful. Fantasy, romance and comedy rolled into 1. I likeeeeeeeeY!

Went to visit little Kyle yesterday too. She's sooo cute! Cradled her in my arms a lot and that little pea only cried once which was easily cajoled into a quiet muffle after a pat or two. Sweet little darling! Pictures with Leon. Will post it maybe later. Peishan is really brave man. Hahaha. The way she was moving around her room made me feel ouchy-ouch for her. Mothers are the greatest, no doubts about it!

Met up with the gang too, Leon, as usual is the living joy of the group. Was great to have him back in the company of everyone. :) Had delicious cze char at Lau Pa Sat and beers at Brewerkz.

Happy :)

Ok, update again.

Gonna meet Leon soon, meeting to buy our Christmas presents!

:)







Still a little unwell.

Tummy still full of gas.

Tummy still hurts a bit.

4 long weeks to put up with aunty.

:(

3 days to Leon!

:)

I must be strong!

But I really cannot anticipate the kind of shit aunty will dish out to me in the coming month :(

Bah.



My manager is seriously lame.

My colleague just told me that she actually offered a lump sum of $500 in exchange for a 1-2 yrs bond.

An excerpt of the conversation:

fairylove says (11:53 PM):
pay peanuts expect fireworks
fairylove says (11:53 PM):
i see u guys all overloaded
Jiachen says (11:54 PM):
tat time she still wana bond me wor with tat pathetic hundred of dollars only.
Jiachen says (11:54 PM):
crazy
fairylove says (11:54 PM):
bond u????
fairylove says (11:54 PM):
shes damn neow lor
fairylove says (11:54 PM):
she bribed u with how much?
Jiachen says (11:54 PM):
coz i applied for sponsorship for my degree
Jiachen says (11:54 PM):
then she say can only sponsor abt $500 i tink
Jiachen says (11:54 PM):
but bond duno 1-2 yrs
Jiachen says (11:54 PM):
siao!~
Jiachen says (11:55 PM):
she ask me fair rite? i say duno.
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
WHAT????
Jiachen says (11:55 PM):
not say full amt wor
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
500 lump sum???????????????????????????????//
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
for the whole degree??????????????????????
Jiachen says (11:55 PM):
yah!
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
Jiachen says (11:55 PM):
n bond for at elast a yr!
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
ROFLOL
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA
Jiachen says (11:55 PM):
least
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
she damn stupid
Jiachen says (11:55 PM):
someone who is in his rite mind will not want
fairylove says (11:55 PM):
sory ah, not trying to be disrespectful
fairylove says (11:56 PM):
btu she tinks u stupid or what
Jiachen says (11:56 PM):
yah tink she tot i am
fairylove says (11:56 PM):
HJAHAHHAHA
fairylove says (11:56 PM):
shes dumb as hell
Jiachen says (11:57 PM):
haiz....
Jiachen says (11:57 PM):
wonder this time i go bak wat pattern she will come out with
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
shes crazy LA
HAHAHAH
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
500 bucks bond at least 1 yr
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
HAHAHHA
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
shes the BEST
Jiachen says (11:58 PM):
i paid 16k loh
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
effing stupid.
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
YA LA
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
ah bo u tell her
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
i pay u 500
Jiachen says (11:58 PM):
at least sponsor 1 semester lah
Jiachen says (11:58 PM):
4k
fairylove says (11:58 PM):
imemdiate notice
Jiachen says (11:59 PM):
hahaha
Jiachen says (11:59 PM):
$500 per day?
Jiachen says (11:59 PM):

fairylove says (11:59 PM):
she realyl suck at mgmt
Jiachen says (11:59 PM):

Jiachen says (11:59 PM):
yup
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
im AMAZED LOR
Jiachen says (12:00 AM):
i also tink so
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
she actually told u that
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
i tink u go back
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
maybe she push u to be editor
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
ahaa
Jiachen says (12:00 AM):
yah, with paul ard tat time
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
paul was therE???
Jiachen says (12:00 AM):
after tat paul wrote me a note
Jiachen says (12:00 AM):
he din say anything in the room lah
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
he nv laugh???
Jiachen says (12:00 AM):
he say dun bother abt her
Jiachen says (12:00 AM):
haha
fairylove says (12:00 AM):
HAHAHAHAHHAHA

Paul was our ex teamleader, under our manager as well. He is what we would call a great boss. Damn nice guy. Funny too. And he's cute as well! Hahaha.

So tell me man, is she stupid or what?

She really is in desperate need for a crash course in proper management.

No wonder the department is sinking so quickly.

HAHAHA.

Ridiculous.



Round 2!

On MC today.

Some viral infection of my intestines.

:(

Anyway, got a call from the bank earlier this afternoon. Shortlisted for round 2 next Friday.

:)

Didn't expect them to call this quickly since they said it will take 1-2 weeks.

I feel really relieved :)

Plus, Leon will be back by then.

Yay!

:)

And oh ya, I tendered yesterday :)

My manager is really -_-

Told me not to be worried about the money but be worried about the opportunity when I asked about the remuneration package they will be offering.

Luckily my teamleader was nice about it(I informed her too when we spoke in private regarding their offer for the perm position). But then again, her last day is next Friday. But she's a really nice lady. And she told me in private that actually someone resigned earlier in the morning. HAHAHAHA. And agreed with me that my current is really too little. Hahaha.

So yeah, I turned my manager down after her disappointing answer. Unfortunately for her, I don't slog for free. :)

And I think I pissed her off. Her face turned blue, then black when I told her I am tendering after she told me about the offer's details.

HAHAHA. Shioks. Superb feeling to turn down a "promotion" and then throw the letter in their face when you know it's all not worth it.

POoooi.

If I don't work for money, what am I working for?



Too much going on in just one day.

1 interview(urgent half! ha!)
1 sms from my TL telling me my manager wants to offer me perm position
1 resignation letter ready in my email inbox at work.

Hahahahah~

Interview was alright.. was very nervous and I'll leave the rest to God. Was a group interview and had 4 other candidates besides me :) Shall not expect too much in case I get disappointed. It's either they really like me or dislike me. Haha. Beng is saying they seem to really like me. (He was one of the candidates too)

Kinda curious to know what terms R will offer me. But I don't think I will be swayed. Afterall, almost everyone there have been contracted for 2-3 years before they are offered a perm position or are still currently contracted. I don't think I have the "face" to accept perm after working there for like 11 months. Tongues are bound to wag. Especially a certain someone :p

And nah, I don't think I want to be dragged into a endless pit too.

Will see what they say later. Dunno to let them know my intention to resign first or listen to what they say first. Hmmm.

Anyway, I am down with stomach flu! Bro got it too. And many colleagues at work are infected as well. Dunno who pass to who. Have been months and this is my second "hit".

Okay, update more maybe later. Gonna prep for work. Tataaaa~

6 more days to my Baby!



Too much going on in just one day.

1 interview(urgent half! ha!)
1 sms from my TL telling me my manager wants to offer me perm position
1 resignation letter ready in my email inbox at work.

Hahahahah~

Interview was alright.. was very nervous and I'll leave the rest to God. Was a group interview and had 4 other candidates besides me :) Shall not expect too much in case I get disappointed. It's either they really like me or dislike me. Haha. Beng is saying they seem to really like me. (He was one of the candidates too)

Kinda curious to know what terms R will offer me. But I don't think I will be swayed. Afterall, almost everyone there have been contracted for 2-3 years before they are offered a perm position or are still currently contracted. I don't think I have the "face" to accept perm after working there for like 11 months. Tongues are bound to wag. Especially a certain someone :p

And nah, I don't think I want to be dragged into a endless pit too.

Will see what they say later. Dunno to let them know my intention to resign first or listen to what they say first. Hmmm.

Anyway, I am down with stomach flu! Bro got it too. And many colleagues at work are infected as well. Dunno who pass to who. Have been months and this is my second "hit".

Okay, update more maybe later. Gonna prep for work. Tataaaa~

6 more days to my Baby!



He's coming back on the 20th instead!!!

His dad arranged a earlier flight for him

THANKIES UNCLE!!!!!!!!

And of coz, thankies Baby for asking if you could come home early^^

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Shit happened at work but I shall not taint this happy entry with it.

YAY! :D

1 more week!!!! :D



Bye Cin :)

Went for lunch with Cin and Meifang today. Farewell lunch. Been having SO many farewell lunches that I think I am getting fat. Haha.

Some pictures we took in Coffee bean today. Had a 2 hour lunch. Hahaha.



Will miss the bitching, second-hand smoking, the slacking, filling TKM's speech bubbles and her lunch/break company :(

But it's ok. Hope she does well over at her new co!

:)

Will see you soon Cin! :)



It's a sunday, and I am wasting it by sitting around, like now, panicking.

There seem to be more and more things going on that adds to my long long list of worries and it's starting to become an annoyance.

I dislike feeling like this. I dislike being in a position where I can't move forward. I want to move forward.

Work still sucks. I did something really out of the ordinary at work on Friday (for my own sake) and there is a possibility that aunty might get really pissed off (basically highlighted I had been backfilling all her shit and clearing up her shit) so yeah, I am not looking forward to Monday. But I am really sick of her attitude. She said she would come back on thursday to work to clear thur's work (she was on leave on wed and fri) but in the end, she didn't, and said she worked from home but "the network was too slow for her to do anything". So in the end, she did nothing and did not follow-up on everything that I emailed her to follow-up before I left the office on Wed. So ended up many files were not processed and all the follow-ups were left undone. Backfilling again, and chasing the various departments to get them to processing whatever stuff that was left undone. She had better not blame me when she fails the timeliness for this month. I am really sick of this. So so so so so sick. I'm so tired.

Just went I want to look for a certain category of jobs, it's not very much available. But I guess with the fat bonuses going around, I might have to wait till after Jan. But I don't know if I can wait that long anymore.

I am just tired.

I've been so drained out with work, clearing someone's accumulated work on a daily basis that I no longer know what time should lunch, toilet breaks, sipping water be. I just work, work, work, work work, and work until it's 5pm - which basically means I have an hour left to clear all her work, on top of mine.

I am trying to hold it out. Trying very very hard. But when it all goes away temporarily, on weekend such as today, when he is asleep, when I am alone, doing nothing, that exhaustion starts flooding back to me.

What on earth am I busy with? And all the effort, what does it amount to?

Exploitation, exhaustion, dissatisfaction is all I get.

And I feel guilty is I try and get out of it. Because there isn't anyone else to take the shorter end of the stick.

And I am so tired, I barely have time nor the energy during the weekdays to look through the ads.

It's time for a break. But I don't have that luxury of time.

Next week, I would have to conduct training for another colleague and aunty would have to take over all cin's work as cin's leaving. And something tells me aunty will make me do all work since "she has no time" and I am so fucking sick of helping her clear her shit while she takes her nap, scolds us, play her games on her pc and complains shes very busy (while doing nothing of her own work and leaving me to backfill days and days worth of work). I just hope she doesn't do somethign as stupid as commanding me to do her work next week because I might just blow up.

And the week after, I will be on training to take over both aunty and my mentor's work. I am not looking forward to soloing the department.

Paid peanuts but expected to deliver fireworks.

Argh.

Maybe it's time I should spend some minutes drafting and printing my resignation letter and leave it in my bag in cases of emergency since I already have my parents' blessings.

Haha.

Sigh. But I really don't want to quit without a job.

:(

I'm really tired.

Another farewell lunch tomorrow.. Been having so many farewells I don't even know whose farewell it's for.

Everyone's leaving.. and my heart has long left the company.

Sigh.

Exhausted.

Sick.

Dreading everything that happens from 9-6 every single weekday.

Oh well.

Back to the grind.



A little late... but Happy Deepavali :)

I hope everyone enjoyed their holiday ;) With the exception of Leon.. Heheh. Busy mugging for his exams :) Ganbatte~

Work has been shitty.. Very soon, in a week.. I would be soloing my department of 3.. the other two will have new jobscopes in the other departments.. And yeah for some reason.. I will be taking over all their work... "can't help it as they can't find any new hire" they said when I mentioned it's too heavy a workload. I wonder how truthful are they, or are they trying to cut cost and have me do everything again. Complained to my parents and they asked me to resign. Sigh. But I really don't want to resign without a job in queue. Will see how it goes.. I wonder how long I can take this. Pay peanuts and expect to see fireworks. What nonsense. Anyway lots of other stuff happened at work, most notably, my boss resigned. HAhahahahHAHHAHA. Yeah you heard me right, my boss resigned.. :) And many other colleagues under her resigned as well. Been going for so many farewell lunches until I don't know who it's for anymore. Lotsa other stuff happened at work as well, but that's another story for another day. Sian to blog about work. HAhahahaha.

Happier news.. My baby will be coming home soon! In about 2 more weeks actually :) Looking forward to it! :D





You are are a complete fool. I don't know how many times I have told you this. Despite what others say, I know you are a nice guy. And I believe in this. You are a perfect toy. If I were who I were many years ago, you would had been my perfect toy when you came along many years ago. And because I know you are a nice guy, I know you deserve better than being the toy she no longer ones. During coffee that day, sitting there hearing what someone said about her, and the rest nodding in approval and knowing what he said, was discouraging. At the end of the day, it does suck to know a friend was a victim, and is still a willing victim.

Snap out of it. As much as we hate to see ourselves as a toy, sometimes we have to drag ourselves out of it and see our worth to the other party for what it really is. That determines if you will be happy or not.

I am happy. Because I can determine my worth in Leon's heart. My worth is of greater value than what I know he has in the past. He calls me 3-5 times every single day to talk to me despite the high telco charges increases my worth. And for that, I appreciate and value his efforts. He lets me go to a club with my friends despite feeling uncomfortable with the idea lets me know he trusts and values my freedom, that gives me my worth. He shares his stress and happiness with me at the very instant through phone calls lets me know I am the first person he thinks of when he wants to share, that gives me my worth. For him to automatically give in to all my whims and fancies at a heartbeat cheerfully, that gives me my worth. For him to include me in all his current and future plans, that gives me my worth. For calling me when I am alone, for calling me when I am mad at my colleague, for calling me when I feel down and stressed and letting me say all that I want for as long as I want, without ever reminding me of how costly it is to talk like that, lets me know I am worth it.

And for everything he has done for me, lets me know, I am worth a lot to him.

And for me, for everything he is, he is worth the wait, and that is why I am waiting cheerfully for him to come back to me.

The road will be long, but I am trying my damnest best because I know it will be all worth it.

People I meet along the way will still exist, will still come and go, but I will always know, there is no one who is as worthy of that wait than Leon himself. There will be no one else I would want to come home to besides him. :)

He makes my life, and the wait all worth the effort.

He makes my fussing over, and anger all worth it.

He makes me mad at him, exasperation on a daily basis (over Leona) is almost guaranteed. He makes me feel helpless at times when I don't know how to handle his multiple personalities and makes me sigh with frustration over his many surprises and out-of-this-world reactions. He makes me feel like strangling him at times over his 16 hours naps. But at the end of the day, I know I will always recount these "difficult" times with a smile on my face and a look of blissful resignation, because I know this will be as difficult as he will ever get. I am quite certain he will never make me feel worse than just being "difficult". If he remains the Leon he is now, that is :)

So what about you, what is your worth? I know she definitely doesn't give you your due worth. You deserve so much more.

Snap out of it.

Before I arrange a Vietnam wife for you.

A fat and ugly one who can't cook, sew and carry babies.

:)

f'Love qing.
quarter century old;
economy whore;
singapore

family;
friends;
gaming;
tarutaru;
anime;
musik;
rain;
food;
shopping;
Smelly Baby

Hollywood
Ju
Yan
Char
Winnie
Our home <3
Fantastic makeup tuts



designer | kathleen
image | nabhan

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